I had an amazing opportunity given to me this weekend to go to a fantastic women's conference. As we set out I knew God had something else for me. He'd already done so much at a previous conference last month- but I knew He would do something big here as well.
As many of you who read this blog know that the last couple of years for me have been hard, at best. But God has recently been moving me, stirring me, and speaking to me in a way like never before!
I felt a shift at that first conference- a call to whole heartedly pursue my dreams & what God is ultimately calling me to- to use my talents and to tell my story. This second conference was about him releasing me to freedom. Freedom from my shame. Freedom to do what He's called me to do. Freedom to live & love as a beautiful glorious Princess- the Daughter of an Almighty King! During the second day of the conference we got to hear from the amazingly talented and hilarious Charlotte Gambill!! First I'll say that she is British, and secondly I'll say that I am obsessed with her & the way God used her to speak to me! She spoke about being "in the middle". About how we as Christians (much like Jesus' disciples on the way to Bethsaida) just cop out in the middle of our trials & storms & issues. We would rather go backwards through all the junk we've already paddled through- just to not have a struggle. When what we need to do is trust that in our need He will get in the boat with us. That we have rely on God's instruction & take one more stroke toward that new shore & towards the new things God has for us. And while she was speaking I really felt this peace just wash over me. Life had been so hard for me recently, but I took heart in the fact that even though I wanted to give up a trillion times- I didn't. I kept putting one foot in front of the other. I kept moving forward because as much as every fiber of my being was straining against the weight of my 'middle' I knew that if I stopped- I would die there. And I knew that wasn't how God or I wanted the story to end. That I had persevered- that was the point. God consistently continued to say to me in those dark days: lay all your hurts, and shame, and anger, and bitterness, and regrets, and pain, and sense of failure on this shore- get in the boat and follow me. This road won't be easy-but I am with you always. So I did. I cried out. I laid myself down. I picked up my cross. I followed.
And this weekend as I worshipped and drew close to The Lord with all those women- He freed me. He said you've reached the other shore. You are free. You made it. Be free.
God has been urging me to use my talents and passion to draw close to Him. To lay what I want aside and to just pursue Him. To let Him open my eyes to needs and perspectives and situations I've never seen or experienced.
A huge part of my life is that I'm the "thirty year old virgin". I'm 100% ok with that! God is teaching me that my emotional & physical and spiritual purity are the greatest gifts I could ever offer to anyone. God is asking me to fully embrace my singleness. To move within it. To speak out about purity. To honor God with my singleness, and use the talents He's given me to do that.
So this October 14th (my 31st birthday) the new and vastly improved blog/tumblr will go live. It will be about many things but it will mainly focus on being a single Godly woman in this day and age.
You can find us at thegoldandthepearl.tumblr.com
I am beyond excited about where this is going and where God is going to take all of us- as we as His cherished, beloved, smart, talented women take up our cross and follow Him.
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