Anytime Soon

"The days that we've collected are so unexpectedly filling up the room."

-Holley Maher

In October I went to the lake with several of my friends to celebrate my birthday. I was wrestling with God about several things in my life. He had really been pushing and pulling and shaping and growing me & I just really wanted some time to relax & get some things settled. I spent pretty much the entire weekend reading & worshipping & talking to God. We talked about a lot of things. Mostly I talked about how my life didn't look like what I'd planned. But that's the thing God gently continues to teach me- I don't want my life to look like what I want. I want what He wants for me. But in October, what I wanted was what I had begged God for-for years, for someone to live my life with. Someone to stand beside me, to walk with me, I desperately wanted a mate, and I wasn't shy about telling God about it. But He continued to stand silent on that subject & continued to draw me closer to him. I kept hearing "embrace this time", "tell your story- it's important", "my timing is perfect" and so that weekend before my birthday in October- I wrestled with God on the porch of a beautiful lake house. I walked away knowing that I had fully surrendered what I wanted & that whatever God had for me I was okay with. I began blogging about my singleness. I began to pour out all the feelings that I felt and all the things I had learned, being a single Christian girl gets really really difficult. Especially in today's society.  I knew that my struggle wasn't in vain, I knew my story mattered. So I began to tell it. That porch was a catalyst for change in my life. 

This past weekend I had the opportunity to yet again go to that gorgeous lake house. I sat on that porch, I watched babies play, enjoyed the beautiful weather, and quality time with my best friend & her family. Mostly I enjoyed getting to spend roughly 72 hours of uninterrupted time with my amazingly sweet, loving, and handsome boyfriend. And this time instead of wrestling with God- I offered up a million Thank You's. Thank you God that you are always faithful. Thank you that you give me exactly what I need- even when I don't know what I need. Thank you Lord that your timing is on a scale that I do not understand, but I do know that it is perfect. Thank you that my waiting was not in vain. 

All that thankfulness, it just flows out of me daily, and sometimes hourly, and I never want to forget what it feels like when God does a miracle in my life. I love that I let God write my love story. I don't regret it for a single second. God didn't set me aside- He set me apart. And for that my heart overflows with gratitude and thanksgiving.